Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Romantic Cynic's Valentine

You never meet the kind of girl you really want to meet in the places where you go to meet girls.

Your soulmate isn't necessarily your lover. It could be a close relative or your best friend. It could even be your dog. Don't get any ideas.

Love songs either celebrate love or mourn its loss. If you think about it, practically every song ever written is a love song. Even Death Metal.

On a sorta related note, all music is based on emotion. If you think about it, practically every song ever written is Emo. Barry Manilow is Emo.

If you kill yourself over a broken heart, the first words you will say when you finally reach the Afterlife will most likely be: "Oh (Insert four-letter word of your choice here)!"

Picture yourself wearily walking down empty rain-soaked streets on a dark and gloomy night, your heart heavy with despair and your head filled with an appropriately melancholy orchestral score fit for a blockbuster movie soundtrack. You're loveless, you feel like $#!+, but at least you look really cool.

True love does not exist. Then again, new animal species are still being discovered, it's possible there might be life on Mars, and people used to think that the world was flat, the sun revolved around the Earth, and man wasn't meant to fly; so what the hell do I know?

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